


My True Love Gave To Me My Authentic Self

by Winterdwarf



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Presents, Harringrove, Harringrove Holiday Exchange, M/M, Miette the cat, Present Shopping, Recovering Billy, ace!billy, ace!steve, coming to terms with past toxic masculinity, post!Starcourt, stop forcing hypersexuality on men, that's why you talk budget, tw: scars
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:02:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28136634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Winterdwarf/pseuds/Winterdwarf
Summary: Billy is still hesitant to admit that he's actually kinda relieved he doesn't have to be the naked present under the tree with a bow on his dick. Even though that might make finding a present for Steve easier
Relationships: Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington
Comments: 3
Kudos: 18
Collections: Harringrove Holiday Exchange 2020





	My True Love Gave To Me My Authentic Self

**Author's Note:**

  * For [funkyspacegirlfriend](https://archiveofourown.org/users/funkyspacegirlfriend/gifts).



> Based on a prompt I got for the Harringrove Holiday Exchange, some ace Harringrove in these trying times, I hope you like it

"You gonna choose anything anytime soon?" 

Billy jumped a little at the drawl of the employee. He'd been so hyperfocused on the shelf with records that he hadn't noticed her walking up to him, chewing her gum all bored like she couldn't give less of a shit whether he actually bought something as long as he left soon-ish.

"Uh, yeah. Sure. You got a lot to chose from", he said, immediately feeling a little silly for not being able to just grab a random thing and book it, but he wanted to get it right.

The employee, her name tag introduced her as 'Jessica', stared at him for a little longer before she rolled her eyes, shrugged and turned to get behind the register again, where she would without a doubt be filing her nails for the next ten minutes.

Billy sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. The neon lights were still hurting his eyes these days. Fucking recovery. And on top of that he still hadn't found a present for Steve, which was marginally worse, especially since he wanted to show that he was really trying, okay? He could go steady, he could, he lasted for almost a year now, he was doing good. But picking out a proper present for Christmas? One that didn't scream 'hey I cost five bucks and he picked me up at the gas station five minutes ago'? He had never bothered with that before. 

Max was easy, he was holding the board she'd been eyeing for a few weeks under his arm. A new toy for Miette, one of the mice she never seemed to get tired of. But Steve deserved something even more special. Like a hawk Billy was making his way through the aisles, scanning every item. Like a hawk with a pacemaker. Slowly losing hope. Until something caught his eye. 

On the bottom of a shelf that displayed a handful of walkmans and dozens of cassettes he struck gold. It was a blue TPS-L2 with colour coordinated headphones. Steve loved his music and he had been moaning about not being able to listen to it virtually all the time. About Keith blasting his shit in the break room. He owned a few cassettes, but feeling generous Billy grabbed the latest from Foreigner, too.

He was barely suppressing a grin as he payed, even as he left the store and was reminded he now had to walk all the way home, the fact he had found an adequate present was enough to keep his mood light. 

It wasn't a long walk, but back then he would have taken the camaro. Just to let her show off for a bit. He missed her, but by now he was fit enough to make it across town without any struggle. Physical therapy and getting back into exercising did wonders.

When he opened the door to their tiny apartment that he'd bought from the shush-money, the quiet he was met with reassured him that Steve was still at work. The shifts at Family Video were packed, so close to Christmas, it was crazy. Visiting him at work meant he had to share Steve's attention with at least five people at all times. 

It was terrible, but right now it meant he could take all the time he needed to wrap the present. Which would be a lot, because where the fuck was the wrapping paper he'd seen yesterday? Steve had packed the presents for the little shits and then...they'd cooked dinner, so that meant... He found the terrible array of Santa's in the top left cupboard. Or what was left of it. 

It took him four tries and six almost-lighted-a-cig-there to cover the entire thing without anything peeking through a gap in the paper. By then Miette had torn up the paper tube it had been on and was meowing for attention and scritches. He ended up just slapping a bow on Max's board and called it a day.

Just as he closed his nightstand's bottom drawer, the present safely tucked away, a key turned in the lock and Steve entered the apartment. 

"I'm home! Oh, hello Miette."

Billy emerged into the living room again, a warm flutter in his stomach. "Hey there, pretty boy. Already home?"

Steve frowned, but only shortly. Then he laughed. "Of course, it's seven! You must've been really busy to lose track of time like that." He leaned forward to plant a kiss on Billy's lips. "You wanna tell me what kept you so occupied?" 

Billy grinned and wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. "Maybe." Then he walked the two steps it took to get into the kitchen. "But let's get something to eat first, you look like you're starving."

***

Steve's breathing was slow and even where he had buried his face against Billy's neck. The steady rise and fall of his chest against his bare back a relief. He'd been sleeping better for a few weeks now and Billy wouldn't dare to move even if both his legs were threatening to fall off. 

Miette was also asleep, rolled up into a soft bundle against Billy's chest, her white fur practically glowing in the dark. She was radiating a lot of heat for someone so small.

But even lying sandwiched between his two loves like this, all toasty and almost in the right mood for Christmas Eve, Billy was wide awake. He couldn't remember the last time he was this excited for Christmas. And even now, with midnight only a few minutes away and the smell of that terrible candy cane soap Steve had been using for the last few days, his next thought was to connect the gentle thrum of his nerves to the phantom pulse of his pacemaker.

The doctor had said that he shouldn't be able to feel it. He was probably right, especially with all the scarred tissue of his chest, but when it was quiet like it was right now, Billy could never shake the impression that he could feel it. A small, intrusive reminder of the fact that he'd never be the same. A traumatised wreck not only mentally, but also physically.

And yet here he was, loved. Cherished. Protected. It made all sorts of mushy feelings bubble up in his chest.

Despite his wish not to wake Steve, Billy held on a little tighter to the arm that was slung around him. 

When Steve started snoring softly, Billy finally drifted off as well. 

***  
"Come on, we gotta open them by the tree!"

Billy groaned theatrically as Steve all but pulled him out of bed. He had just enough time to dig the present from his nightstand before he got dragged to the tiny tree they crammed into the tiny living room.

They sank onto the couch and Steve handed him a little box with a bow, excitement still clear as the day on his face. Billy couldn't help but smile.

"Merry Christmas, baby."

The box was surprisingly neatly wrapped, with a red bow on it that easily came apart as Billy pulled the string. 

He felt Steve's eyes on him with an intense curiosity, so he stalled. "Hey, you wanna open it? With the way you're staring-"

"I just can't wait to see your reaction, come on, just open it."

"Alright, alright." Forgoing a careful unwrapping, he ripped up the paper and lifted the lid.

"It's second hand, but since the camaro got trashed I thought you missed the road. And I know it's not her, but it works and is actually kinda fast." Steve was rambling, not even looking at Billy anymore, seemingly embarrassed he could only afford a second hand vehicle.

Billy was just staring at the key, waiting for the whole thing to register. It was for a Maverick. Steve had attached a keychain with a little basketball. Steve had bought him a fucking car.

"You bought me a fucking car." 

Steve scratched his neck. "Yeah. Had to pull a few shifts more. Worth it though." 

"I-" Billy swallowed. "Thank you."

"Really got you there, huh? You haven't been this speechless since what, 84'? When you saw how shitty Hawkins is?" The tension had melted from Steve's body and the tease had no edge to it.

"It's- that's way too much, I can't-"

"Yes, you can", he said, taking the key out of the box and placing it in Billy's hand, gently closing his fingers around it.

Billy swallowed again, still overwhelmed. Then he nodded.

Steve smiled. "So what have you been hiding behind your back all this time?"

Shaking out of the shock of surprise, Billy regained his composure and ability to speak in coherent sentences.

"You know, I was considering squeezing my fine ass under that tree. Put a bow on my cock and bestow upon you the best Christmas gift ever." He grinned, handing Steve his present.

Steve rolled his eyes, but he obviously couldn't bring himself to pretend real annoyance. 

Billy continued. "But I'm fine getting you the second best one, since we're on the same wavelength and both prefer this. Though it was a pain in the ass to find, and not the good kind", Billy couldn't help but add, to cover up the actual relief that shone through at not having to present himself on a silver platter like that. It had happened before, but he hadn't enjoyed it the way Tommy had made it out to be expected.

Heeding his own impatience from before, Steve tore open the wrapping paper with no thoughts of ironing and reusing it later. 

"Actually", Billy said quietly, "I'm happy about it. All this hypersexuality shit was never really my thing."

He expected some kind of reaction from Steve, maybe some reassurance, >hey you're still figuring out the whole asexuality thing<, but Steve was still staring at the walkman, his bambi eyes wider than usual.

It brought a variety of thoughts rushing through Billy's mind. What if he didn't like it? What if he thought that compared to what he got it was not enough? What if he put in too little effort? Could couples break up on Christmas? Shit.

He opened his mouth to say something, anything, save the situation, but Steve started smiling brighter than the sun. He turned the walkman in his hands to admire it from all angles, feeling along its edges and the curve of the headphones, before looking up with what could only be literal stars in his eyes. 

"I love it!" He all but threw himself at Billy, hugging him so tight it punched all the air from his lungs.

"Knew you'd like it."

"You were shaking like a leaf."

"That doesn't mean shit", Billy grumbled, knowing damn well it was true.

"Yeah, right." Steve laughed and pulled away just enough so he could look at Billy properly.

"I love you."

"Love you too."

A little lost in thoughts, Steve tugged lightly on one of the new locks that barely made it past Billy's ear. "By the way, I heard what you said. I'm proud you listened to yourself. You know, next time you feel compelled to go the sexy route, you can talk with me about that."

Billy nodded. He would. Maybe not next time, or the one after. But the one after that he definitely would. 

He leaned in for a soft kiss.

"Merry Christmas, pretty boy."

**Author's Note:**

> The title came to me thanks to my best friend, I love her, she deserves the world, happy holidays


End file.
